Everlasting

Hello, I kind of retract what I said the other day concerning my fears about my name being like Kurt Cobain's. The reason is, I don't want to be too cautious now-- the field is white. So I am still Dallas Jolley. 

Also, my car is running super and that diagnosis comes from a really, really, expert mechanic I talked to. I am driving an 85' Camry now and it is very clean and well-maintained. I did get sideswiped a while back by a sick, crazy driver and she wasn't paying for damages, but I'm fixing that now. She is paying. 

This mechanic I talked to is very, very old and knows his stuff. He says I have an open road and am clear to drive just about anywhere.....Hmmm. 

I said last post that I may be vindicated. That is not a hope but a promise, and I already have been a lot- but I am thinking about the core person or problem now i.e, our modern day Hitler. (You all know who I'm talking about so I won't say). Yeah, I don't think he is going to last five more years is my prediction. We can do it! Remember we helped Sophie NorCAL. She is free now partly because of us.

I said I wanted to be fair with Laura Madsen / Meek. I interpreted my dream about her and yeah, she was bizarre and trying to make me homeless, but who wasn't back then ( yeah, that's what I want to know). I don't know how I was so wrong about her and why I had some awkward guilt trip that I was putting her out. She makes my shape-shifting family look perfect. 

So anyway, I still don't look that well. I guess take that into account. All I can say is I am grateful for those people who have a more refined sense of discernment. They have been looking out for me and have helped me so much.  

Well, I don't work and pretty much all that God has told me to do as of recent is to reflect, recalibrate, keep the commandments, support and exhort the church and work on going live. I'm spoiled. I feel so optimistic right now I can hardly express it. 

I recently did another round in my thinking and came back to where I was ten years ago. I found that that has been so true all this time and has never left me. I am so blessed. I don't want to be more specific now, but I hope the person I am thinking of knows I am talking about them. Sorry, actually I meant "talking to them." Ahhh, words don't express what I am trying to say now. Everlasting is probably the best word that describes what I feel though. 

Names

"I do not care how learned a man may be, or how extensively he may have traveled. I do not care what his talent, intellect or genius may be, at what college he may have studied, how comprehensive his views or what his judgment may be on other matters, he cannot understand certain things without the Spirit of God....."  -- Heber J. Grant

Been thinking about Kurt Cobain alot lately. His music was so good it is tragic how he died. Now, I am not getting cold feet or anything, but sometimes I think that like Kurt Cobain, the name I have frames me. It is sadistic people in the sky, my family, the mental health system and other places that want to make me a public spectacle and fall guy. 

I'm sorry, I am not going to go that route and get lifted up on the cross just yet. I am thinking I want to change my name now to Aran Ziplman. That is an even less adversarial name, I know. Am I taming down a bit? I don't know, things have just gotten a little too predictive and psychological for me lately. I'm getting smarter and smarter all the time and feel like I could get pigeonholed again. 

I have made a real effort not to get stuck in the rat race and to keep my time open since going to the mental hospital. I suffered from tunnel vision before when I was studying non-stop and working in the law. All I could think about was money and those things. Now I am seeing the big picture and protecting myself from the blindside. I am psychologically stronger now.

So anyway, thanks again to all the people who have helped me and shown me some grace. I needed time to catch up and probably still do, but I must say I am in a lot better situation than I was in ten years ago. I look back now on that time now and realize I was in a world of trouble. Even today I am finding some of the cars that were after me then. God has cut off the arms of all my enemies and today I am almost free as a bird. I probably don't deserve this second chance at life but I am going to make the best of it. 

Remember the prophets are in Jerusalem now. I hope you all are well. God bless.

All Safe and Secure?

The act of voting is one opportunity for us to remember that our whole way of life is predicated on the capacity of ordinary people to judge carefully and well.  --Alan Keyes

A while back I wrote a post about young trees, a beetle infestation and rotten primary teachers. I accidentally deleted the post but am happy to say that that is not a problem anymore as far as I can see. I have to say, you all are very quick and effective people. The trees are in good hands with you and I think all is safe and secure now. I will keep my eyes on the lookout for anything else I see.

What I saw with R. Modesto a while back and a couple other girls really shocked me though. I don't know how some of you all manage so well with such opposition. I want to go live and join the military after seeing what I saw but for some reason, I can't figure out where to go. I think it has been hard with the COVID 19 isolation going on. And don't get me wrong, I would drop everything here and go live if that is what I'm supposed to do, but the thought also keeps coming to me that U R DIE, not the other way around.

Another thing that prevents me from going live is that I am a little worried about making that plunge into the unknown and becoming completely dependent on the day--but I am learning to trust more now. Arranging things secretly is also a problem. Lastly, the better things get, I am feeling like there is no place to hide anymore and that I should just try and go live in plain sight here at my place and that that will open up for me in the future. I think I have earned a license to fight and organize myself according to the laws of men now, so that is not a problem. Heaven actually kind of forbids me from doing anything too drastic..... 

So anyway, I am not exactly sure what I am going to do in the future. Life is bearable for me now thanks in large part to you all. Now I want to give back. I am just taking it one day at a time, preparing to go live if I see where to go, and trying to stay in shape so I am prepared to do that type of work if needs be. I have the size and body type to do that sort of work --so I am thinking it is a waste that I'm not doing some of that now. But that is just me, I want to do it myself and dabble as much as I can in as much as I can, even when things in the world are calling for more specialization.

Things are quickly becoming safer and safer here in the states with technology advancing like it is. I mostly go outside the United States now to countries like Russia and Vietnam to C people in ware, but I wonder if I am missing something here. Some people like R. Modesto have so much against them things may seem very slow in coming. I almost couldn't believe what I was looking at when I looked into R. Modesto's situation. I swear, she is like Christ.  

I'm going to pray hard about it, and if I am doing more good here where I'm at then I will continue. Whatever accomplishes the most good and is best for the oppressed and the kids is what I will do I guess. 

I find sometimes that it is not always what I want to do, or have thought to do, that is actually what I'm supposed to do. For instance, I wanted to move from the state a long time ago because I was worried about my monthly mental health shot being bad and my family living too close. I was just sure I was supposed to leave the state but got alternate revelation to stay here for a few years and that God had an important work for me to accomplish. I'm not sure if I have figured out just what that important work is yet but I am at least resolved on living in Utah for the next little while.